Nine Lessons I Learned at Thanksgiving

About eight years ago I hosted my first Thanksgiving dinner in my home. I was newly married, living across the country from the ones who had prepared all of my previous Thanksgiving meals. What I thought would be a smaller gathering of friends who lived too far to travel home ended up being a delightful time with 33 of our closest friends. Needless to say, I learned a lot that first Thanksgiving dinner I prepared. As Thanksgiving is nearing and I’m planning another meal with family and friends, I’m reminded of the lessons I learned, many of which can apply to a variety of event planning scenarios.

Here are nine lessons I learned while hosting my first Thanksgiving dinner:

  • It’s natural to be nervous before an event you plan. No matter how big or small, the feelings of “what if” can inundate your mind. While a level of nervousness can be expected, remember to allow yourself the opportunity to have fun. After all, this is your party, too.
  • Some people notice the details; others do not. Pay attention to the details. From tying a fall-colored ribbon around a candle holder to setting the table with care, take time to incorporate special touches when you can. This will make a big impact on those who share in your desire for perfection.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help or clarification. If you don’t understand something or aren’t sure it will work, ask someone. I think I called my mom no less than ten times while preparing that Thanksgiving meal.
  • Be smart in the choices you make. If you don’t own a dishwasher, paper products might be the best option unless you want to spend your afternoon washing dishes rather than fellowshipping with friends. Think ahead as you plan.
  • You can make a space work. I never thought we could fit 35 people around tables in my home, plus have space for food. You know what? It was cramped, but it was intimate and fun. While you won’t be able to fit 100 people into a room designed for 25, there are creative ways to utilize the space you have.
  • Don’t forget the kids! Will there be children at your event? Set up a kids table with kid-friendly activities. Spend a little extra on goodies the children can take home. Parents will appreciate the thoughtfulness.
  • Let people help. Often people want to help, but they don’t know what is needed. Sometimes simply asking a question such as, “Could you bring the ice?” allows people to feel included and valued. If others offer, let them help if it is conducive to your planning. The end result might not be the exact thing you had expected, but, including others will take the pressure off of you. If it’s something that is a “make or break” for you, consider asking someone you know will do it the way you want it done. For the other, less important things, ask for help.
  • Know your strengths and weaknesses. That first Thanksgiving in my home, I had a huge fear about preparing the turkey. There was a chef who lived two doors down coming to our meal. I asked him to do it, and he gladly agreed. What was weighing heavily on me was easily passed off to someone much more qualified. When it comes to events, utilize the strengths of others in places where you might fall a little short. For example, if you are completely afraid of speaking in public, ask someone who is comfortable in the spotlight.
  • There is always, always, always something to be thankful for. Don’t forget that. In the midst of the hustle and bustle of planning and making it happen, remember the purpose of the time—thanksgiving, family, friendship, fellowship. It might just change your perspective as you try to figure out how you’re going to cook five different dishes at five different temperatures and keep them warm enough to serve.

Happy Thanksgiving, from our team to yours. May your day be filled with lots of laughter, family, friendship, fellowship, good food, and most of all, gratitude.